The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
Nominator: Rublamb (talk · contribs) 16:08, 8 September 2023 (UTC)
Nominator: Rublamb (talk · contribs) 16:08, 8 September 2023 (UTC)
Reviewer: Arconning (talk · contribs) 13:28, 6 June 2024 (UTC)
Done c. 1961, use c. templates for the circa symbol in the infobox and lead. Done Bold his birth name. Done Reginald Barnes Jr., aka Reggie Barnes (born c. 1961), spell out as also known as, and put it after the birthdate. Comment: I combined the two names as this is a better solution Done Put his education as Cape Fear Technical Institute yet wikilink using original text. Comment: I created a redirect for Cape Fear Technical Institute as this was lacking Done Source his height. Comment: This in now included at the end of the Personal life section, with sources. Done the founder/CEO of Eastern Skateboard Supply, the largest skateboard wholesale company in North America., you should probably put this info in the body as well and source it there instead. Comment: Good catch. Thanks! Done Endless Grind Raleigh, North Carolina, change to Endless Grind in Raileigh, North Carolina, unless that's the actual name of the business. Done the next generation of professional skaters., next generation might be too informal. Done is a wholesale company, in Wilmington, North Carolina, add comma on the end. DoneEast Coast., wikilink. Comment: The first use of East Coast in the lede and article body are already linked. Done Barnes is from Cary, North Carolina, add comma on the end. Done In 1976 when he was fourteen years old,, add comma after 1976. Done flips suited Barnes who, add comma after Barnes. Done open air basketball courts, add hyphen to form open-air. Done Change title to Amateur career to emulate other sport biography articles. Done as par tof Tem Powerflex. , as part of Tem Powerflex unless it's supposed to be Team Powerflex. Change accordingly. Done "a dynamic freestyle routine", add comma after routine. Done 16–19 Freestyle contest, from my knowledge of skateboarding, freestyle should be uncapitalized. Done Change title to Professional career to emulate other sport biography articles. Done a pro, add comma after pro. Comment: I changed "pro" to "professional" Done Huntington Beach California , Huntington Beach, California,. Done "real' pros", remove apostrophe. Done Di Dootson, add comma on end. Done Barnes sponsor Powerflext, add comma on end. Done $50/, replace slash with a period/full stop. Done world champion Chris Chadwick, Rodney Mullen, add comma on end. Done Wilmington North Carolina, Wilmington, North Carolina,. Done at Magic Mountain, add comma on end. Done "Good energy and crowds, back east they don't have much going on like this, so it's good fun for a change of sceneries. Lots of fun.", add [sic] template. Done in Germany in 1987, add comma after. Done Stoked!." , remove period. Done November 1, 2000,, add On at the start. Done neon–yellow, replace with hyphen. Done Spell out months. Done In the 1980s, Unreel Productions produced a series of videos documenting the National Skateboard Association's championship competitions.[47] Released in 1986, Skateboard: NSA '86 Summer Series Volume 4: Oceanside Street Attack showed highlights of the Oceanside, California Freestyle Contest, including Barnes' entire fifth place routine.[47], this statement just uses the same source another time. I suggest just putting the reference on the end. Done Oceanside, California, add comma on end. Comment: That would be putting a comma in the middle of the event's name. Done Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990), add comma on end. Done in the East Coast Motions volume 1,, remove the and capitalize Volume. Done Barnes had the industry contacts, while Flythe had the line of credit., a bit informal. Done Barnes contacted his mentor Bruce Walker,, add comma after mentor. Done the company grossed, the company had grossed. Done sales are $24.64 million, change are to were. Done Pro-skater Pat Duffy, pro-skater, pro-skaters, remove hyphens. Comment: I changed all uses of "pro-skater" to "professional skater" unless it was used as part of a team or competition name. Done 20,000 square feet, 20,000-square-foot. Comment: This is automatically generated by the convert template and is, therefore, not editable. Done Barnes frequently brings famous names, a bit informal but wouldn't mind it. Optional. Done Rename the section to Personal life. Done Cape Fear Community College), son Mason,, put comma at end. Done Wilmington after graduating,, remove comma. Done both which continue as successful businesses., to both of which continue to be successful businesses.. Done Although not known as an innovator, either change wording for a more formal approach or add quotes to "innovator". Done Rewrite, this would be better if it's written as paragraphs rather than bullet points. But if the bullet points were to be kept, please rewrite to a more formal tone. Comment: This was already written as paragraphs but formatted as a bulleted list to break up the text visually. I am fine removing the bulleted list if that is your recommendation. Please note that the informal tone is in the quotes. Done There aren't any images but even locations where he skated would be useful. Images would heavily improve the article due to the length of it, might need some visual aids for the reader. Comment: I totally agree with this suggestion but am limited by copyright. This was the era of niche print magazines and video recorders, not online publications and Flickr. Most of the locations were closed years ago; even articles on the locations and skaters lack photos. I found and added one location photo (to both this and its article), an event logo, and a couple of photos for the mentioned skaters. (I looked for all locations and named skaters). Not perfect but better. I also linked numerous videos to External links. This will not help the visual nature of the text but will provide images to go with the text. Done Reference 34 is a site for online selling, change. Comment: Moved to external links as its role was to show the skateboard and logo. Done Reference 44 cites an image, though seems to be from a reliable source but would rather link the actual website instead. Comment: I can only link to the magazine issue in the Thrasher archive, not the specific page cited (which was the previously linked PDF). I made this adjustment for all items from the Thrasher archive. Done Manual check, some wording is a bit too close with sources such as ref 28 and 31. Comment: I went back to ensure I was checking the right citations but didn't see your concerns. 31's overlap was a long quote, in quotation marks. I removed the quote. 28 has an ad with no sentences as a source; the overlap appears to be the name of the skateboard and the use of one other word. Nevertheless, I reworded the sentence.